CHRISTINE MEETS HER GREAT-GRANDPARENTS

A Doggie Dog World

Louise and Jeff happily announce that they are with dog and have bought a house. Since they only sent pics of the dog, one can only infer the more personally significant event.

So whose dog is cuter? Louise and Jeff's? Katie and Garrett's? Maggie and Ryan's half-breeds (other link)? Or perhaps DrMark's gerbil?



Now listen up you Deranged Dog People. Though roundly accused of being "gay with my cat", you don't see me disseminating pics of him on the World Wide Web, now do you? (though I had to buy an external hard drive just to keep them all)

Henceforth, I am instituting a "don't ask, don't tell, won't blog about" policy towards perverse pet-owner relationships. I tried mockery but it obviously backfired.

Happy B-Day Jeff!!!

Mexico?

So while every 'can is trying to come into our country, Maggie and Ryan are looking to buy a place in Mexico. So long as family has first dibs, I am all for it. Only I would prefer that they buy a condo in Miami - out of personal convenience.

Ostensibly, the vacation was for Ryan's birthday and as you can see, the whole family made the trip.

By the way, Maggie hasn't disavowed any rumors from prior posts.

Even More!!!

Yes that is the pic of Ryan urinating in Margarita's mailbox.

Ryan probably could have been arrested for indecent exposure but never would have been convicted for obvious "lack of evidence".

I have added three pages to the wedding pics - courtesy of Helena. Click here to start on page 9

The pics didn't really shrink down too well. If someone could tell me how to do it for the future that would be good. Also, I think some of you need to lower the resolution on your cameras. 3 megapixel shots are just intractable, as far as emailing, uploading, and downloading.

If you haven't already, check out Joe's photographer's site. They have a fantastic video up on it. Click here.

Now below find a couple of shots TimL took from a plane over the Pashmir mountians in some terrorist-sponsoring country.

Wedding Facts

• First of all, I think I speak for everyone in saying that the entire weekend was a blast.
  
• Wayne showed his virility by inhaling an artichoke pizza. Next perhaps he'll be trying out metrosexual TimL's bio-organic maple face cream.
  
• Ryan went from the most underdressed at the ceremony (jeans) to the most overdressed with the $2,000 Gucci suit he wore to the reception. However, one of his nameless aunts-in-law remarked that he donned the same $10 haircut throughout.
  
• DrMark dispelled the rumor that he was dating a senorita from Worcester - the demographic we all thought he was trying to get away from. He copped to dating a Bolivian chica whose life was in turmoil because ascendant socialists were nationalizing her family's airline business. DrMark elaborated, proudly declaring that he broke up with her on principle. He agreed with the Communists and thought they should give up ownership of the business "for the good of the state".
  
• SteveK greeted a soon-to-be navy officer at the reception with, "yeah, you are the one dating that chick with the massive teats, right?". Okay, he didn't say exactly that, but he may as well have. And they say that DanL is the most inappropriate cousin...
  
• Did y'all meet Rambo Furlani? Others will have to catalog exactly what he did at the bar. I have been told that he stole a nacho or two right off some guy's plate but otherwise was a belligerent all night.
  
• Speaking of physical confrontations, most of you missed Ryan getting thrown a good 15 feet at the bar by some young broad. I was right there but unfortunately didn't hear exactly what smooth line Ryan unleashed before the madame put two hands on him and sent him flying like a wet noodle. It was eerily a Seinfeldian moment (think Elaine).
  
• One complaint about the otherwise perfect wedding. How about when you first got in the yacht club, that long line of people trying to get in? It happens at every wedding. Old people spend an eternity trying to find their seat assignments. Note to fossils - first try to ascertain your last name, next phonetically impute the first letter, then go from there.
  
• Sarah's boyfriend Peetah must be on low carb organics or something. He's so skinny I expect to see him soon in Subway commercials.
  
• I am still waiting for a pic of MarkJr in his tux.
  
• Hey if Inez can make this wedding 3 days before birth, MoMerk should have to go home for Christmas/Kwanza, December 28th due date or not. When I confronted her with my suggestion, she retorted, "I deliver very fast". Well, I reminded her, we have plenty of medically certified people in the family. DrMark or DrTom could deliver her child. This inexplicably induced nausea in the lass. Mo don't be such a prude.
  
• Also this weekend we learned of DrMark's "sleep apnea". Apparently he brings a sleeping mask with him everywhere and two sets of ear plugs - one for him (so his own snoring doesn't wake himself up) and one for whomever he is sleeping with that night. In this weekend's case, it was for roommate TimL. I'll bet ten pesos that they smelled like Bolivian airline peanuts.
  
• KathyK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  

• KathyK proclaimed that she "won the contest". Though not quite remembering the actual details of said contest, I'll concede her the victory. This chick in blue just loved our entire family. As incontrovertible proof of that I'll offer the fact that she gave DrMark her number.
• By the way, Ryan did actually pee in Margarita's mailbox in full view of dozens of patrons - many of whom congratulated him later in the bar. There is a picture floating around that needs to be promptly sent to me.
• KathyK also insists on being listed in the next Fertile Family Women pool (link link), to which I most certainly will oblige. The pool will be reset shortly after Maggie officially announces that she is with child. I must say that she almost pulled the wool over everyone's eyes - nursing drinks all night. The dead giveaway for me was the realization that she wasn't acting as flagrantly stupid as she normally does at a wedding.
• TimL was wondering if someone could email him directions to Margarita's. And he also has some burning fetish for a Greek diner to which he needs directions as well.
• Though a good-sporting, resilient convalescent, I simply have to mention that Anne broke LizL's kitchen faucet. Not only am I ratting out my most devout co-blogger, I also took the handicapped room at the hotel.
• I want to thank LizL and MarkL for a wonderful brunch.

Okay, the photos are still coming in but click here to see what I have so far. Thanks to all who contributed pics or content via their own manifest inanity.

I didn't shrink the pics down so it may take a while for them to load.

DrMark's Latest Charity-Subsidized Vacation

He went glacier climbing in Washington. The last pic is one of the guides that he fell in love with. Only his affection abated after she "dropped trou" a mere 30 yards away and pinched a love-testing loaf right before his very eyes.

Gotta love those crunchy broads.

Maggie and Ryan's Mongrels

Feeling left out on all the baby/pregnancy news, Maggie and Ryan wanted the spotlight on their babies at least for the moment.

I can't believe the gumption of those yuppies trying to upstage Joe and Kelly's wedding, a successful MoMerk fertilization and the birth of little John's sister.

Personalized dog biscuits....unbelievable.

Inez adds,

"If that's what they are going to do with their dogs, what'll they do with their kids!?!?!?!?!?"